Pursing Passions

A few months ago I was meeting with my counselor and she was talking to me about figuring out what I'm passionate about. At first I was just like, "Umm, I mean, I guess I'm a mom so I'm passionate about mothering?" I wasn't sure how to respond. It's like when someone (usually not a fellow Stay at Home Mom) asks me what my hobbies are. I go blank. Does washing massive amounts of dishes count as a hobby? Surely not. Ugh. It can make you feel lame.

So I've been praying for God to show me more about what I am passionate about. What stirs my heart? What are areas where, even if I'm not the greatest, I find joy in sharing and talking about with others? In some crazy way, I feel like this "list" that I've come up with actually captures so much of me. Putting it in a list seems a bit silly, because it's not like you just have separate, ranked areas of your heart. But for blogging purposes, this is what I've got.

1. Family. I am intensely focused on the idea behind raising a family that spends time together and loves each other. Yes we fight and drive each other crazy. But one of my desires is to create such a strong bond between Ryan and I and our children. This also extends to our other family. I want my children to grow up really knowing their grandparents. Lucky for us, we have some awesome parents who love our kids like nobody else.

2. Jesus. Okay, before you write this one off as a typical pastor's wife answer, let me share more. I am passionate about a Savior who offers redemption. I am in love with God sending this hope into my dark days. I want my children to know him. I want my friends to know him. I want to encourage my friends that do know him by reminding them to keep seeking him even on the hard days. I want to share Jesus with more and more people. Nothing can change generations of a family more than a heart in love with Jesus.

3. Learning. I almost wrote this one out as home school. Some days I love doing school with Eva, some days I'm kinda ready for her to go somewhere. I don't know. But I am passionate that she gets the opportunity to learn. I enjoy creating lessons. My heart goes pitter patter as I find lessons on Pinterst and print them out and cut things and put little pieces in ziplock bags all in the name of learning.  I enjoy teaching. Usually. Watching her put letter sounds together to figure out words last week was AMAZING.

4. Health. I am super interested in the inter-connectivity of the body. I don't understand the science behind everything, but I am a believer in holistic health. Along with this, I am passionate about nutrition. I've been gluten free for over 3 months now. I almost caved when I saw the latest Olive Garden commercial, but my passion for putting the best in my body to be the healthiest I can be for me family won out. I want to raise kids who are knowledgeable about the foods that fuel their body and not fill them with junk because it's easier. I kinda wish I could go buy a farm and grow all my own fruits and vegetables. Maybe one day. I also think the evolution of food is both fascinating and terrifying. There is so much fake food going into our bodies...ok, stepping off my soap box for now.

5. Finances. Our small group has been going through a Dave Ramsey curriculum and I am passionate about learning to be wise with money. Ryan and I did a similar study early on in our marriage and some of the baby steps we took early on have allowed me to stay home, even though we live off a comparatively small salary (as in compared to the area we live in, not compared to the global economy). I feel empowered when I find ways to stretch dollars and save. I would love to do financial counseling for younger couples or college students...not how to get rich but how to live wisely off what you have.

6. Mom Life. I love the movement for moms to connect to other moms. Mom friendships look different than other relationships. You find yourself chasing children in the middle of conversation, or chatting to your friend on the phone while realizing your are both nursing babies at the same time. I love opportunities to be transparent and share real life with other moms. Almost three years ago I read THIS BLOG POST by another blogging mama where she shared her real, difficult, experience of deciding to take medication to help with post partum anxiety. Even though her story was slightly different from mine, her writing still echoed in my mind when I was deciding whether or not I wanted to try antidepressants after having Jensen. Her open, honest writing helped me make an important decision years later that greatly benefited me and my children. How awesome is that? Which brings me to my last passion...

7. Sharing my voice. Whether through writing or speaking, I feel really called to use my life and my stories to encourage others and to testify of Jesus. Right now that means blogging and sharing when I'm with other moms. In the future...who knows? Sometimes it is a bit scary, but it is also freeing.

These days I am doing everything I can to shift all my focus into these areas. I want to live purposefully for God, and that comes through living out the passions He has laid on my heart.

A quarter earned is a quarter saved.

Recently Ryan and I started leading our small group through Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University course. If you have never read or watched anything by Dave Ramsey I would highly recommend it. We did a study about 6 years ago so we already know and practice many of the foundational principals. One of the best things we did for ourselves was establish a written out, categorized budget about 3 years ago. I know, it doesn't sound fun, but it is! Living off an established budget is so much more fun that worrying about money or just hoping that you "spend less". As Dave says, you get the power to tell your money where you want it to go instead of just wondering what happened to it at the end of the month.

Anyway, as parents we want to install financial wisdom into our children. Eva earns a quarter for every day that she plays quietly during her rest time. Yes, we pay our kid to be quiet for an hour and a half each day. You might disagree with that, I don't care. Nap time used to be such a huge source of stress and tension and now it is not. Completely worth it. And with her ability to earn money comes the opportunity to teach her about saving and spending what she earns.

So last week she had saved up a few dollars worth of quarters and wanted to get a new Chelsea doll from Walmart. We were thinking that they cost $5 but it turns out they cost $6.97. Sadly we discovered this when Eva was already on the Barbie aisle with hopes and dreams to bring home her new doll that day. She actually had almost $6 (due to collecting a few random pennies and nickles here and there) so I knew it would be the easy parenting thing to just help her cover the rest. But I didn't. We really wanted this to be about her learning to use her own money to buy something extra for herself. We talked about how she didn't quite have enough and showed her a few things that she could afford to buy, or we gave her the option to come back as soon as she saved up enough money. She spent at least 20 minutes examining everything and saying, "Hmmmm....let me think...." It was pretty cute. In the end she decided to save her money for a bit longer so she could get what she really wanted. I was so proud of her! I wasn't going to force her to do that but I was glad that she really cared about where her money was going!

At home we calculated exactly how much she would need to save. She earned a few more rest time quarters and then did some extra chores around the house on Saturday so she could go get her doll that day. Her normal chores are putting {most of} her laundry away, unloading the silverware from the dishwasher, making her bed, and helping pick up toys. She earned money by pulling weeds and helping to wash both of the cars. I love that she chose to work to earn more.

I finally took her on a date to Walmart to pick out which doll she wanted. She lined up every single Chelsea doll and examined each of them. She finally picked one with beautiful butterfly wings. She gave the lady at the cash register her money. The only sad part was when she had to give away a dollar bill that she had saved in her piggy bank. I guess somehow she didn't realize that was part of the money she needed. After much deliberation she decided she was okay with that.

Since she actually has two piggy banks at home I am hoping now to teach her to have one to save for herself and one to put money in to give, either to the church or to help somebody. We have done Bible lessons and talked a lot about being generous to help others so I feel like she would be ready for this. It is so awesome to get to teach your children about things that matter so much!

Budget CUT ( and The Bachelor)

 

One way that Ryan and I have thought of to save a few $$ is for me to learn how to cut his hair. Ryan usually likes to get his hair trimmed once a month so we figured that cutting back on this expense would add up (pun intended). Now that the experience is behind us, I'll admit that I was nervous. I'd cut hair once before but it has been years. I wanted Ryan to still have a professional look that didn't scream home haircut. My friend Melissa is an actual hairstylist so tonight we went over to her house so that she could walk me through Ryan's first big cut. 

It is intimidating to start up the trimmer for the first time and jump into the haircut. Kind of like that first dive into a cold swimming pool. Thankfully I had a guide there to help me otherwise I would have been too scared. We started slowly since it is easier to go back and cut more off than it is to make cut hair grow back. At one point our friend commented that she'd, "Never seen anybody cut hair quite that way...." I'm pretty sure she meant that as a compliment, right? In the end Ryan's hair turned out great and I think he trusts me to do it again! 

Now on to more important matters....The Bachelor premiered tonight! It was a hilarious kick off to the season, seriously soooo funny. I was missing my best friend Erica watching the show beside me like we used to do back in Denton. The Bachelor is always better when you have people to share judgements comments with. Ryan was following Kelly Raspberry from Kiss FM on Twitter during the show and her tweets were so great we were literally LOLing. I'm not on twitter, but if you are and you watch The Bachelor you should follow her on Monday nights. Was there anybody that really stood out to me tonight? No. I like Sean as the Bachelor and hope he stays true to his character. I want to know where in Dallas his family lives. I like Kasey B. and am glad she's back. I think those girls need to consume way less alcohol on the first night. I'm looking forward to another addicting season!

It just makes cents.

One of our family goals for the new year is to live by a better budget. Ryan and I went through one of Dave Ramsey's financial studies a few years ago and it taught us a lot about using a biblical perspective and wise guidelines for handling finances. The idea of following an established budget seems really great until you get all of your expenses down on paper (or computer) and realize what you actually have to work with. Blah. It is very easy to look at it  and think, "Do we really want to follow this?"

But our answer is yes. Yes, we want to live within our means. Yes, we want to remain debt free. Yes, we want to be wise stewards of the resources God has blessed us with. And most importantly, YES, we want to be content with what we have knowing that one day it will all pass away anyway.

But godliness with contentment is great gain.

1 Timothy 6:6

I truly want to be content. With more or with less. I want to be living thankfully within his daily provision. And sometimes that means making realistic sacrifices.

Spoiler alert - when your husband works for the church and you stay home, you will not likely ever be millionaires. That's okay, I knew that going into this thing. When I married a man that wanted to be a youth pastor, sharing with him my heart's desire to stay at home with our children, I knew full well that we probably wouldn't be jet setting between our homes on different contents or driving fancy cars. The joy and blessings in our life far outweigh the sacrifices. Really.

When I have those twinges of this-isn't-fair feelings in the moments where I can't spend frivolously, I want to remember that we are so much richer than most of the world. We have a home to live in. We have 2 cars that work. We have food on the table. Our closets are abundantly stuffed with clothes. We have insurance (that alone is a hidden blessing that many Americans are suffering without). I want to change my prospective about budgeting to think of it less as a restriction and more as an adventure. It can be a fun to look at what we have and find creative ways to live off less. Yep. Fun.

So here we are, finally in January, and ready to begin our budget. Time to cut back on the extras like eating out or shopping. Time to make wise decisions to start saving now for future expenses likes cars or babies or dental work. Time to check out hearts to make sure that we give generously as God calls us, for we have been generously given to.Woo-hoo! Our adventure begins.

Garage Sale-ing

Twice a year Trophy Club allows its residents to hold garage sales. It seems a bit crazy but it's actually pretty smart. This allows for people from wherever to come and check out all of the garage sales in the city at the same time two days a year. I had a few items on my garage sale, bargain hunting list for a while so I was looking forward to waking up early to shop the sales.

Before I get to what I actually purchased, let me share a few of my thoughts on garage sales:
1. When you are planning on hosting a garage sale you weed through all that you own and pick out the belongings you don't want anymore. Then you start to have high hopes that even though you don't want it anymore, maybe somebody else will want to pay good money for it. Right?
2. When you are shopping a garage sale you know full well that the person selling doesn't want that stuff anymore and that it is very likely that whatever is left unsold will be donated anyway. So you want to pay the cheapest price possible, right? Interesting juxtaposition.
3. I'm not a haggler. Just tell me what you think I should pay for it. If I think it's worth it I will buy it. If not, I won't.
4. No matter where a garage sale is hosted, many people have the same old junk that comes creeping out. Strange lamps. Dusty vases. Random shoes. Puzzles. Also so many people were selling non-flatscreen TVs and big computer monitors. I'm guessing that the market for those items can't be huge anymore.
5. Clothes being sold at a garage sale are no where near as appealing as sold in a store, even a resale store is much more attractive. For some reason seeing the clothes in piles or boxes or even hung up outside just screams "OLD CLOTHES" and I lose interest even though I love bargain hunting for clothes!
6. Yet isn't it crazy how much most people will spend on new clothes that within a few years they will most likely not even want anymore? Same with shoes. In store - $40. Garage sale - $.50. That is terrible depreciation of value. But it's true.
7. When there are hundreds of people having a garage sale in a small town parking is crazy. There should be a rule about parking on one side of the street so that people driving to drive past don't risk hitting other cars.
8. Some things are awkward to sell at a garage sale. I won't name them, but really, think about what you're putting out there before you place it out on the sidewalk for the world to see.
9. Design matters. The most appealing houses have items on tables. You should also put big ticket items out for people to see as they drive up.
10. This might be going back to number 1 on my list, but if you are hosting a garage sale, don't overprice your items. People looking to make more should consider selling these things on line. If you are selling a table at a garage sale for $200, you are probably not going to find someone to buy it. That's fine if you want to drag it back inside at the end of the day. I guess it's all a matter of perspective.

Now on to what I bought! My best find of the day was a desk for our living room. Previously we had been using a card table with a table cloth on top of it so I was hoping to upgrade a bit. I found this solid wood, good condition desk and purchased it for only $10!!!! That is a good bargain. It's very sturdy and I like the finish. Plus for only $10 I won't feel bad if something happens to it (crayon marks by a toddler) or if we move again one day and I have to get rid of it (which I hope never happens because I love where we live). I also picked up two toys and some books for Eva which she will be receiving for Christmas (right now they are cleverly hidden in the closet). The one thing I was really looking for and didn't find was a Little Tikes coupe car. I think Santa will be bringing her this. I guess he better start looking at Craigslist and Kid to Kid if he wants to get a good deal :)

Money Saving Mama

I was in need of a few shopping items yesterday. Eva needed a new pair of shoes because her feet seemingly grew like three inches in the past month so her old shoes were too tight, and she needs comfortable shoes since she likes to walk now. I needed some new shorts because (1) it's summer time in Texas (hot.),  (2) I've lost weight so the ones I bought back in March for my post baby body are now way too big (yay!), and (3) I got rid of my old smaller clothes back in December because I thought they'd never fit again (oops.) Like lots of people, our family budget doesn't have a lot of extra $$ to put towards shopping. Lucky for me, a friend had told me about a place called GW Boutique in Keller. It's actually right down the street from the office I used to work in and I had driven by tons of times but never knew anything about it. Guess what the GW stands for? Goodwill - as in the place you go to buy a funny Hawaiian shirt for a theme day at work. Their boutique sells all of the higher end brand clothing that people donated to Goodwill for only slightly more than regular Goodwill prices - brands like Ann Taylor Loft, Banana Republic, Express, Gap, etc. I decided to stop by and check it out. It was awesome! Of course there are the occasional items that were probably purchased from those stores back in the 90's, but overall they had tons of good, stylish clothing that you couldn't even tell was used. I ended up getting a pair of NY&Company shorts, an Ann Taylor Loft top, and a Gap skirt for only $25! I probably would have spent twice that just for one of those items purchasing it new at those stores. I will definitely be going back in the fall when its time for me to get a new pair of jeans :) If they asked me to be in a commercial to tell everybody how great this place is I would do it. Seriously, if you live anywhere near Keller at all it would be worth going to. I even saw a few items there that I own in my closet.

Then I still needed to get Eva some shoes.... so we drove a minute down the road to Kid to Kid, a kid's resale clothing place. I ended up getting her two pairs of Carters shoes because they were on sale for 25% off. I only spent $5 for both pairs of shoes. They are cute and don't look like they've ever been worn (one pair still had the tag on them). It was a successful afternoon of shopping and I love finding great bargains!