Guest Post: Why Is Making Adult Friends so hard? {Thankful for Community}

Thank you to Angela from Living Pretty for this guest post. Angela teaches 4th grade at the same elementary school that I used to work at. I follow her blog and when I read this post I knew that it was something that so many women can identify with. Most women want friends. Real friends that they can laugh with and cry with. Friends that you can call to chat about real stuff, or sometimes to chat about nothing at all. We have this innate desire because God created us for authentic relationships. Not relationships based on pride or vanity. Relationships based on love and true acceptance. Know this about me, that if I take an interest in you and act like I want to be your friend, it is because I actually want to be your friend.

Today I am thankful that we were created for community...for the friends I have and love...for the opportunity to reach out and connect with other women.

Why is making adult friends so hard?  

Friends.  That's what we are going to talk about today.  I feel like I have been searching for friends for forever.

Little background:
I went to a small private school my entire life.  I was friends with who I was friends with because they were in my class for years on end.  Thankfully, those friendships have developed into much more than "I am your friend because I have known you for 12 years."

I also went to the same church for a really long time.  My other group of friends are from church.  and I love them dearly.  However, not a single one of them lives nearby.

Speed up to present time:
I have lots of good friends at work.  They are funny, and sometimes we hang out outside of work.  It is always a blast.

I have several friends at church.  Those are in different stages of relationships.

Those friendships I developed when I was younger are pretty strong because most of them I talk to on a regular basis or if we don't don't talk on a regular basis, we are able to pick up right where we left off.

Here's the problem I am struggling with:  I want refrigerator friends.  (Meaning-I am comfortable to come over to your house and eat whatever from your fridge without asking and you are able to do likewise.)  ***Let me state, that I do have one of these nearby, and I don't want that person to think I don't consider them in this category, I do!

I want to be vulnerable with this person. I want to talk about all those things that I call my faraway friends and talk about. I want to come over when my husband is monopolizing the tv.  I want you to stop by whenever. I want you to invite yourself over for dinner.  I want you to sit on my couch and eat junk food and watch Real Housewives.

I have been looking for friends like this for years, since college.  Why is it so hard?  I feel like I put forth effort.  I am always looking for people to invite over for dinner.  Maybe they will be my fridge friend.  But then I find out that they already have enough fridge friends or they are in a different stage of life than me and that doesn't work for them.  (Regarding the stage of life thing, I think it is a load of crap.  My best friend lives hundreds of miles away and has a baby, and we make it work.  I think if we live in the same town, we would be able to make it work.)

I don't understand what else I have to do.  Do these friends exist?  Am I wishing for something that is intangible?

Guest Post: Mesothelioma from Secondary Exposure {Thankful for Health}

James 1:17
Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

One thing I am truly thankful for is the health of my family. This past weekend my baby was sick and we were stuck at home while she rested out her fever, but thankfully it was nothing serious. My parents are healthy, my husband is healthy, and our beautiful girl is healthy. How often though do I thank God for my own personal health? Honestly not much. It's more usual that I wait until I am sick to ask for healing. Below is a guest post from Heather Von St. James, a mother, wife, and cancer survivor. 

Mesothelioma from Secondary Exposure

“You have cancer.” I have never been as scared as I was the day I was told those awful three words.  About 3 1/2 months before I was diagnosed with cancer, I had been in an emotional bliss because I had celebrated the birth of my daughter.  Then I was being informed that I had cancer, specifically, pleural mesothelioma cancer.  This type of cancer was usually a result of being near asbestos.

Like most people who I talked to after my diagnosis, I thought asbestos was banned, and I wondered where I could have come into contact with it.  I quickly learned that asbestos was not banned, and I learned where asbestos could be found.  Sadly, I quickly knew that it came from my father.  My father was never aware of the danger he was putting his family in when he came home from his construction job each night with white dust covering his clothes.  He never knew that those tiny white particles contained millions of microscopic asbestos fibers.
 
Unlike the typical mesothelioma patient, I was only 36 when I was diagnosed.  Most patients are older and work in different trade jobs.  Some of these jobs may include plumbing jobs, heating jobs, electrical jobs, mechanical jobs, and military jobs on ships.  Other patients were women who handled the asbestos filled laundry and the secretaries who worked in schools that had been built with asbestos filled materials.
 
Today’s generation of mesothelioma sufferers look similar to me.  They are young men and women in their late 20’s and early 30’s. These are the children who were around their fathers who had asbestos on their clothes after work.  Like me, these are the children who ran into their father’s arms when they came home from work with asbestos filled clothes.  These are young men and women are just getting married and starting families of their own.  Like me, the mesothelioma brings their lives to an unforeseen halt.  However, these patients are able to celebrate the fact that more medical advances have allowed people of all ages to have better odds of surviving this disease.

The word cancer is a devastating word.  It is more devastating when you learn that you have cancer.  Many mesothelioma patients, including me, have hope in surviving this fight.  The mesothelioma sufferers are a community.  As a community, we are able to talk together, share our experiences together, support each other, and cry with one another, but most of all, we can celebrate our victories together.
 
I continue to share my mesothelioma survivor story with others to bring awareness to mesothelioma.  I truly believe that if there is more awareness to this disease, then fewer people will have to suffer from it.  I tell my story to give new patients hope; I tell my story to help sufferers to stop living in fear.  If one person benefits from my story, then I know I am doing the right thing.

To find out more please visit The Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance Blog.

A Visit to Santa

Last night Eva got to see Santa for the first time! She told him that she's been a very good girl (eats and sleeps like a champ!) and that she would like a huge package of Pampers for Christmas (let's be practical, Santa!). Just kidding... but it was fun to get a picture of her with Santa. We went to the Westlake Community Christmas and had fun walking around, visiting friends, and seeing the Big Guy. I'm sure I mentioned this last year, but I LOVE community holiday events. LOVE them. Everybody is so happy and there is music and laughter. Tonight we're making the trek to Denton for Eva to go to her first Wassail fest. Hope to see many Denton friends there!

P.S. Check out the onesie on Eva. I made it by tracing her hands for the antlers and her foot for the reindeer head. Super easy and way cheap, plus it makes a fun keepsake!

Dedicated to the Ones I Love

This blog post is dedicated to all the people I love...starting with my amazing husband! I love this picture that was taken the summer we were engaged. I came home for lunch today to find a beautiful bouquet of flowers, a funny card, and a gallon of icecream for us to enjoy tonight...What a fun surprise! Thanks, Ryan!!!! I love you the most.
My parents and grandparents. I like this picture that was taken the first time Ryan preached in 2009. I love that my family was there to support him!
And here's my other family...aka the ones that loved my husband from the day he was born! I am thankful that Bruce and Cindy raised him to be such a gentleman, and that Greg and Amanda let him grow up as their brother. Love those Bradleys!
My best friends!!! These girls have been there for me for sooooo long. This picture is from a Christmas party in 2006. I love ya'll and have had so many fun times with you!
Our new friends at Redeemer. I picked this picture from the Sunday they were all baptized because it symbolizes my love for our friends and out mutual love for Christ! I was so proud of all of them for getting baptized and sharing their testimonies!

Happy Valentine's Day! Share it with the one you love.